WHAT THE HECK? (And random attempt to add photo to blog)

Alright, as some of you may know I have had many struggles with my weight and nutrition recently. College is not a place where it is easy to be healthy, even for a 'somewhat health nut' like me. Roughly 3 minutes ago I just weighed myself and found myself to be 123.6 pounds. I try to weigh myself every week or every other week. Last time I weighed myself I was 129 pounds. A while back I went from weighing 125 to 121 in about 3 days. I know its normal for a person's weight to fluctuate and all, especially women, but this is just getting ridiculous. I eat like a bird when I do eat, can't focus well and have become mildly dehydrated which means its hard for me to wear contacts and after I work out I usually end up vomiting any water I have drank. Plus I am trying very hard to get myself rehydrated again and its just not happening that fast, if at all.

I am taking 17 credit hours this semester and I took 18 credit hours last semester. I think this overloading on top of all of what I am already involved in and committed to in my life has me very stressed, unable to focus and produce the quality of work I am famous for, and has definetly affected my health. Now, since neither of my parents went to college and I had no idea what to expect coming into the University, you'd think my advisor would help me out.

Uh-Uh.

I got nothing from my advisor. A sheet of paper and was told to pick out classes from here and here. That helped a lot.....*sarcasm*. If someone had told me what was normal for a class load would have helped. I was under the impression that because I am an honors student it is expected to take the full load. Apparently not. I'm just seriously disappointed with my experiences thus far and am mortified I might lose my scholarship from CAP. I'm getting two tutors, one for spanish and another for math, but they cannot meet with me until after midterms. I've been trying to study more, but between trying to get to class, doctor appointments, taking care of things at home, homework, doing laundry and keeping things picked up, my commitments with U of I Extension, finding time to eat, finding a way to sleep in this forsaken little white box of death they call a dorm room, I'm having a tough time. If I could get into a town house or apartment I would, unfortunately CAP Honors makes me stay in this place another semester.

*Sigh*


Complaining brought to you courtesy of my big fat mouth...


I've just got to keep trooping along I guess and pray for the best. Thankfully I know that God and good friends always have my back.


See you Space Cowboy...





Oh, and okay..... this is a special announcement made just for a certain person who knows who he is: I, the Lady in Black, do confess that I am not really politically conservative. I am actually more moderate with leftist leanings and fiscal conservatism. Happy? .... yeah.... I know you're smiling.... and you can just stop that right now......

I think I'm going crazy seriously. To stand to look at oneself is an amazing feat so few can attest to truly accomplishing.

Writing in college? No... not really...

The thing that hath been, it is that which shall be; and that which is done is that which shall be done: and there is no new thing under the sun. - Ecclesiastes 1:9

Ah, how sad it is that this verse rings true. I am working on my 'Writing in Discipline' paper for CAP and I am continually given the advice to 'paraphrase' my sources and it just seems to me that all these silly papers do is make us paraphrase. Where is the new ideas? The fresh look, the gathering evidence to come to our own conclusions at? It's like a book report for land's sakes! I want to know what is the point of college writing if it seems like all we do is research and never present an actual valid, original viewpoint. I see none of this. When do the CAP students stop writing book reports and start actually writing?


If I sound frustrated, it is because I am.

There truly is no new thing under the sun, but even more so in college writing. We are simply reproducing and representing works others have already done, and done much better may I add. *sigh* Give me research to do, give me a history or a bookreport or an overview to do if you want me to. But DO NOT call it writing, darn it. Don't call it that, because that's not what it is. It's regurgitating information that has existed, will exist and continues to exist... how blase...






*sits in corner hugging knees rocking back and forth*

"Hug me."




See you Space Cowboy...