- I have no privacy
- Things don't change
- Always remember to be on your toes
- You MUST have a reason for anything you do. (I.e., Going somewhere, wanting something, doing anything etc.)
- People don't give a care
- Money is all that matters.
I feel like an absolute convenience case, and I hate being isolated, which is what I am again.
This sucks.
Now, for a slightly positive praise:
Thank goodness for slightly more regular sleep and food. I still have trouble sleeping, but I am back to my usual grazing. I eat little bits throughout the day rather than sit down and eat a full meal. Some say its better to eat that way, my mother frowns on it. Oh well.
The bad news is I fear for my weight now more than ever. I think about my weight a lot. Trying to maintain it at a healthy level is a constant worry.
Also on the brightside is that I have a job that is supposed to give me about 40 hours a week now. However, though I was considering getting another job, my mother is really pushing me to get a job for weekends or nights. I was already considering this, but I feel indignant at this coercion. I've never been anything but hardworking and 'picking up a few extra hours' for me will more than likely mean further isolating me from any semblance of a social life. I feel like that my life is meant to be comprised of work and school and that is it. Perhaps so...
Nonetheless, I am going to find my own way, or at least try to. I don't care if i struggle, that's what makes life worth while.
Dear Lord, thank you for the good, the bad and the in-between. Because without it Lord, life would just be so boring.
Cheers mate,
Your Lady in Black
3 comments:
dear lord girl, do NOT overwork yourself.
You are indeed one of the most hard working individuals I've met in recent months. Granted, I am a bit near-sighted, but I don't see how gaining weight will change anything about who you are, or your ability to express that identity, unless of course, one of the night jobs you're considering is mannequin. ...no mention of Indiana Jones. I'm surprised.
There's been times when I've wanted to give advice, but couldn't because it's something I wouldn't have done myself.
This is not one of those times.
Move out.
Making yourself miserable won't make anyone else happier. And if it did you should get rid of those people immediately.
Money is not all that matters.
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